My Name is Alanna and I’m Single…

Confession #1: I’m not in need of a support group.

Let me explain. If you’re like me, your initial response to the title of this post would be “Hi, Alanna” spoken like any good support group would. Maybe you’ve been there. Maybe we all just watch too many movies. Support groups are great and serve a much needed purpose. They help with healing, accountability, and dealing with a problem you realize you can’t handle on your own. I’m for them but when it comes to my singleness, I don’t need one.

Again, let me explain. “Single” for me is {usually} simply a descriptor of my current marital state. Hopefully, it is temporary {and then I can change my blog title to “Confessions of a Formerly Single Woman”}. It is not my identity. It is not who I am. I have not always realized this. And some days I forget this. Those days are NOT pretty. I’m a hot mess on those days. I question everything about me. I feel rejection much more deeply {and sometimes imagine it when it doesn’t exist}. I worry. I hurt. I look in the mirror and see only flaws. I attack myself with all of the reasons of why I must be single. I eat anything unhealthy I can get into my mouth. Right about now you may be thinking, “Alanna? Are you sure you don’t need a support group?” That may or may be what I’m thinking right now!

Confession #2: What I do need is Jesus

Here’s what I’ve learned…and why I don’t think I need a support group. Being single isn’t a disease {that means isn’t contagious, in case you’re worried}, a deformity, or something I must get rid of. It doesn’t hinder my life unless I allow it. It simply means I am not married. My identity and who I am as a person run much deeper than whether I am married or single. My identity is based on the person I am because of one relationship alone and that is my relationship with Christ. He is the only man that gives me value. He is the only one that will satisfy my deepest longings. He alone gets to determine what I need to change in my life.

This doesn’t mean I don’t need people or friends. This does mean that with my relationship with Christ come a plethora of blessings, including the people He puts in my path. I need them. I need the joy they bring to my life and the lessons I can learn from them. Regardless of what their status is, when Christ places us together we are meant to live life together and sharpen each other. And, let’s be honest, I need them to know which days to give me chocolate and which days to say “Step away from the chips.”

Wanna Be Friends?

Confession: I’m not perfect but I think you’ll like me. Then again, you might not.

So, I want to be friends with you. Maybe we’ve met in person but, in this world of technology and social media, it’s also possible we haven’t. I think if we’re going to be friends, we should probably get to know a little bit about each other. Here’s how we’re going to do that. I’m going to tell you a few basics about me in this post. Then it will be your turn!

I am Alanna {uh-lay-nuh} Dawn Arceneaux {we won’t even try the phonetics on that one}.I was born in Lafayette, LA on September 9, 1976 {that makes me 38 this year}. I am the oldest of three children and the aunt to 3 of the most amazing girls ever born. I love children but have none of my own. I am single, never married, and was never as close to marriage as I may have thought at certain times. I want to be married but take the words “I do” very seriously and won’t say them to any old guy just to be married. Most importantly, I love Jesus and His church. Those are kind of the basics, if you will.

What I like: lime in my Diet Coke, rainy days on the couch with a comfy blanket, my mama’s cooking, space and time by myself, genuine and real friendships, my family, cupcakes {I seriously think mine are the best}, football, belly laughter, Pinterest, New Orleans, peanut butter, a good book, movie popcorn with extra butter, Adam Levine, pajamas, and a long hot bath.

What I don’t like: cats, yard work, dirty hands, baked beans, drama, passive aggressiveness, horror flicks, sweating, mean people, black coffee, early mornings, irresponsibility, driving, and zombies.

What I’m a sucker for: fresh flowers, chivalry, blue eyes, confidence, good conversation, a good chick flick, puppies, dinner in a nice restaurant, cards in the mail, just because gifts, skinny Cinnamon Dolce lattes from Starbucks, unsolicited kindness, honesty, and a good grilled cheese sandwich.

I am: a planner, detail oriented, a hard worker, cautious, kind, loving, a people person, compassionate, sensitive, insecure at times, confident at others, good at my job, a great cook, never going to be thin or petite, creative, stubborn, observant, critical, and funny {at least I think so}.

The reality is it is near impossible to tell you who I am in a few words. But this is a start. Keep reading and you’ll see who I am and what makes me tick. You won’t always agree. That’s ok. You may decide you don’t like me. That’s ok, too. You can tell me that…but don’t try to convince me that your opinion is right and mine is wrong. It won’t work. I told you I am stubborn, remember. But I am also open and would love to get to know one another. May this be a place of community, sharing, encouragement, discussion, and growth. And if you’re ever in my neck of the woods, let me know. We can meet and talk and you can try one of my delicious cupcakes!

So now it’s your turn. See that box at the bottom that says “comments”? That’s where you’re going to tell me about you. Ready. Set. GO!